Travails and Triumphs. Life and Love. A blow by blow account on the daily life of a sales woman and her quest for world domination one purchase order at a time.

Saturday, December 29, 2007

initiative

I had somewhat of a serious talk with someone who I highly respect and admire.

This person asked me several questions which I know will lead  somewhere that I have been wanting to talk about for a good long time.

Thanks to a certain friend, he was a bit privy that I am having issues at work. He just doesn't know which issues they are.

Sadly, due to time constraints and because it was not a one on one conversation, 
I had a difficult time pouring out my real thoughts.

It came out as me acting like I wanted attention because my boss have not even checked up on me if I was still alive or what.

The real score is I want to know where I stand. I wish my superiors would talk to me and tell me about my progress. At least in the professional sense I can classify that one as being concerned with my well-being.

Lately, I have been feeling rather useless or no longer an asset to the team I represent. That I am just there to hit numbers and nothing else.

This person I admire tells me to be the one to initiate.

I wish I could have told him that I have been doing that. It's just that I don't get to be heard.

That it seems they do not trust me.

And I can surely feel it.

I wish someone would have the guts to talk to me. I don't bite. At least you're honest about it.

Maybe one of these days I'd change my mind and just ask them "Where am I going?" or something much more tamer.

If there's one thing that I liked when I had this talk with Mr. I-highly-respect, he makes sure he lets me know that I am wrong and I have to be the one to make the move.

*sigh*

Oh well.

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